This is it.

No familiar heartache that I expected, no tears welling up even when I thought it was about time they started streaming down. Maybe this is my way of accepting that this is the way it should have been done. I don't know if I'll regret, feel stupid even, but I don't know what else I can do. I don't know if we could ever be friends again, but if we don't, it would really have been my loss for losing someone whom I know would make a really good friend. What I said was so extreme that I didn't believe I actually said it because a part of me still wished it didn't have to go down this way, but what else is there to do? It would be a lie to deny that a small part of me regrets, feels stupid for saying that but if all other ways didn't work out, then my self delusion is going to get me nowhere. This is like splitting all over again but just more definite, more clear...

54789543 years from now..
Who knows?
Maybe yes, maybe no.